For some people, using sex toys is as much a part of sex as anything else, but if either or both partners haven’t used sex toys before, or made it part of your relationship, it can feel nerve-wracking or awkward knowing how to bring it up. It’s important to note that there should be absolutely nothing awkward about sexual pleasure, for either of you, and nowadays it’s much more common to use sex toys regularly to enhance pleasure. Here’s how to introduce sex toys into your relationship.
Start a Conversation
If you’re a spontaneous couple, whipping a sex toy out of a drawer mid-act might be totally fine, but it won’t work for everyone, can be super intimidating and your partner might feel too awkward to say it’s not for them in the moment. Feeling uncomfortable isn’t sexy! Start a conversation about sex toys out of the bedroom first. Start easy with, ‘have you ever used a sex toy?’, ‘do you own any sex toys?’ and ‘are there any you’d like to try?’. Maybe it will lead to a little shopping session together!
Knowing your partner’s body is cool! Discussions on pleasure and what really gets them going is a great way to initiate sex toy shopping and demonstrate that you really know what gets them going. Choosing toys together is a really fun activity and ensures everyone is happy with the toys.
It’s About Levelling up
For some people, bringing sex toys into a relationship can feel like their partner saying what they have now isn’t working or isn’t enough for them but it’s important to assure your partner that sex toys are about building on what you already have, not for replacing each other. We want to increase pleasure but not take away from what we already have.
Say What you Want
Introducing sex toys into the bedroom is an important pivotal point. Make it clear that you are both learning what feels best with the toy and it’s a time of learning for you both. Be clear straight away with what feels good where and what doesn’t, go slow on the settings and build upwards. That way, you both know what the other likes because you’ve been direct and communicative from the start.Sex toys are a great way to keep a sexual relationship fresh, try new things and experience more pleasure with your partner. If you’re not sure where to start, look for toys that build on what you already have and leave no one out, such as the love ring or the clit suction toys. And don’t forget